reprobayt: (BooYa)
Breathe in, breathe out, repeat.

Yes. I'm still posting here beyond questions, polls and humor.

I had to take a step back until life has paused enough for me to type without cursing the chaos in my world.

TheChild is still here with the Grands. It'll be months or years until she's on her feet enough to leave. That will be the subject of many rants, tears, arguments and general stress in my life.

Doesn't matter today because of something only a select few of you have known about.

===
In ye olde nutshell:

A few weeks ago, my wife L found a lump in her breast. Mammogram & ultrasound followed. A comparison on her last checkup showed that the mass had grown a wee bit. So off to the surgeon last week to get it checked out. Lots of worry and fear has made sleeping, coping and life in general very interesting.

L just got the call. All clear.

So complaints about politics, family, the weather, Fox News, unemployment - whatever.

My baby is OK - all I'm seeing is sunshine and rainbows today.
reprobayt: (Default)


Too much stuff going on...brain is full. Gonna grab L and get away for my birthday and to think.

Be back mid-week. All normal Emergency protocols apply.

Be Excellent to Each Other.
reprobayt: (Default)
Just being there can be enough. Even when you wish you could do more...
I hate arguing. I'm good at it, but I hate doing it.
Anger is fleeting...at least it should be.
Sometimes, it really is just a Comedy of Errors - not some grand scheme to ruin your day/week/whatever...
Sadly, my car is old enough now where it runs best on Premium.
Time with a fascinating, lovely person can remind you of how great your life is and can be.
With some people - as soon as you give them credit, they screw up.
I need unlimited flight benefits and a large discretionary fund.
Nightmare still suck, no matter how old you are.

My life ain't that bad.

Ugh.

Apr. 24th, 2012 09:23 am
reprobayt: (ID4)
Went to bed on the frustrated/envious side of the bed.

Sadly woke up there too.

What's making you smile today?
reprobayt: (Me)
Today is my 21st wedding anniversary with Lennetta.

I look at that number and shake my head -- I am coming ever closer to being married more of my life than not married. It is a fact that I have known L since before many of you were aware of life (hint: it was before MTV). I think that means I am old, but I'll ignore that thought. :)

I suppose I could wax poetic about romance, stubborness and trickery. I could talk about the ups, downs, peaks, valleys. I could write about the laughs, tears, fights and reconciliations.

But I won't because many of us have those stories and scars.

I will simply say this: I could not be the man I grew up to be without her. Period. End of story.
reprobayt: (Rocks Fall)
Stolen with love from [livejournal.com profile] padiwack:

"My plans for old age? Age badly. Follow random pathways in the forest. Smoke a pipe. Become a hermit. Never shave ever again. Take Ecstasy on weekends. Develop a Valium habit. Read the Bible. Go to Tibet. Become an MP. Change my name. Laugh at economists. Start skanking dancehall style."


~ Thom Yorke (2001
reprobayt: (Morris)
The calendar has done its' job and we are back here again.

It's been a year since we lost Michelle/[livejournal.com profile] olliesmama...and I still want to just go into a dark room and cry when I think about her. Then I hear scolding me in that voice that said She Meant Business, threatening to sing to me if I don't cheer up. :)

I wrote this last year, and it still rings true. Miss you daring - I'm just sayin'. *weak smile*

============================

Michelle was the sister I never had. A partner in crime. She was my Jerome and I was her Morris Day.

We argued about Survivor and reality TV, laughed about her love for Rick Astley and Simply Red and kept planning for one of us to fly to the other and surprise each other. She wanted to see the world, meet the people she knew by name and voice and experience life.

She cheered me up with bad jokes and I gave her hope and distraction from the many problems she faced healthwise.

I don't know what happened...I can only hope it involved her chairdancing and bootyshaking with the music up loud and the cats being amused at their mama.

Because even with her health issues...at every point, at every obstacle and at every opportunity -- she Lived.

*hugs*

Dec. 28th, 2011 03:06 pm
reprobayt: (Default)
Things in my head...no time to let them out.

Consider this a bookmark - will hopefully be about to fill the pages with words next week.

*hugs*
reprobayt: (Default)
I am less jazzed this year than most for Halloween...I think it's just that there's so much going on inside & outside my world that it has me a bit "bleh".
If it hits me, I am prepared with candy and a costume easily assembled from what I own.

In other news, I have been actively pushing the social envelope this week. I have gone to new places, tried to do new things. I have reached out to people I want to know better and/or to those I want to be a better friend to - the results have been mixed, but that's life...right?

What are you up to/in to?
reprobayt: (Default)
I am less jazzed this year than most for Halloween...I think it's just that there's so much going on inside & outside my world that it has me a bit "bleh".
If it hits me, I am prepared with candy and a costume easily assembled from what I own.

In other news, I have been actively pushing the social envelope this week. I have gone to new places, tried to do new things. I have reached out to people I want to know better and/or to those I want to be a better friend to - the results have been mixed, but that's life...right?

What are you up to/in to?
reprobayt: (Default)
Oooof.

Ouch!

*rip* Ooops. Sorry - I'll clean that up.

=============

(Don't mind me - trying to get out of my comfort zone...)
reprobayt: (Default)
Oooof.

Ouch!

*rip* Ooops. Sorry - I'll clean that up.

=============

(Don't mind me - trying to get out of my comfort zone...)
reprobayt: (Default)



I remember. I mourn. I choose not to turn away but understand those who do.

I look in the sky and remember.
I listen to the cries, arguments...the faithful and the cynical - and remember.

I know where I was, where my friends were and what happened in the days following - and remember.

I listen to the naysayers, the bigots, the political finger pointing - and remember.


What I remember is telling my young daughter that things will never be the same.
I remember watching the images, holding my wife and knowing that things would never be the same.

I listened to the speeches and watched the actions in the days and weeks that followed - in a vain hope that the spirit of togetherness would continue. I watched as people lost and gave their lives in the months following in a noble cause. I sighed as I watched revisionist history and political grandstanding in the years following take the place of common sense and a common goal.

But it mattered not - because I remember.

I remember those who in a moment of crisis showed the best that is inside all of us.
I remember those who lost their lives due to bastardization of religion.

I will Always take this day to Remember.
reprobayt: (Default)



I remember. I mourn. I choose not to turn away but understand those who do.

I look in the sky and remember.
I listen to the cries, arguments...the faithful and the cynical - and remember.

I know where I was, where my friends were and what happened in the days following - and remember.

I listen to the naysayers, the bigots, the political finger pointing - and remember.


What I remember is telling my young daughter that things will never be the same.
I remember watching the images, holding my wife and knowing that things would never be the same.

I listened to the speeches and watched the actions in the days and weeks that followed - in a vain hope that the spirit of togetherness would continue. I watched as people lost and gave their lives in the months following in a noble cause. I sighed as I watched revisionist history and political grandstanding in the years following take the place of common sense and a common goal.

But it mattered not - because I remember.

I remember those who in a moment of crisis showed the best that is inside all of us.
I remember those who lost their lives due to bastardization of religion.

I will Always take this day to Remember.
reprobayt: (Snoopy)
I swear yesterday was Life in a Nutshell.

Morning sucked. Stress and Worry ran rapid, beaten back for a little bit by a Good Thing (getting my glasses back) and a Kind Word (unexpected compliment from an unexpected person at work). Received News from friends and family that helped give Perspective.

Good Food and Support from [livejournal.com profile] felishathekitty - then a Household Meeting/Reality Check of Our Financial Future (which was not pleasant but had to be done in these crazy times).

Then Conversations with Good Friends made the night better before Restful Sleep.

And we're doing it all over again Today - because I'm Stubborn Like That.

============

Tell me of Your World...
reprobayt: (Snoopy)
I swear yesterday was Life in a Nutshell.

Morning sucked. Stress and Worry ran rapid, beaten back for a little bit by a Good Thing (getting my glasses back) and a Kind Word (unexpected compliment from an unexpected person at work). Received News from friends and family that helped give Perspective.

Good Food and Support from [livejournal.com profile] felishathekitty - then a Household Meeting/Reality Check of Our Financial Future (which was not pleasant but had to be done in these crazy times).

Then Conversations with Good Friends made the night better before Restful Sleep.

And we're doing it all over again Today - because I'm Stubborn Like That.

============

Tell me of Your World...

urgh.

Jul. 29th, 2011 09:20 am
reprobayt: (Global Frequency)

Can't we just make the weekend start Right Now?  *sighs*

Posted via LiveJournal app for Android.

urgh.

Jul. 29th, 2011 09:20 am
reprobayt: (Global Frequency)

Can't we just make the weekend start Right Now?  *sighs*

Posted via LiveJournal app for Android.

reprobayt: (Morris)
Today would have been [livejournal.com profile] olliesmama's birthday. She and I were born three days apart so I would call her. Then when we was done, she would laugh and say "Talk to you in 3 days". Then she would call on the 10th and sing to me, Marilyn Monroe-style...never quite making it to the end without giggling. I am trying not to be too sad...

She's been DJing in my head so it’s been Morris Day, Rick Astley and Simple Minds. And giggling in my head – chair-dancing too. It's kinda nice to know that somewhere she's dancing for real. I miss her and will raise a glass in her honor tonight.


As far as my birthday is concerned, I have decided to be selfish. Gonna go out of town with L for a couple days, then taking next week off and doing things I want to do. Or at least try.

Wish me luck.
reprobayt: (Morris)
Today would have been [livejournal.com profile] olliesmama's birthday. She and I were born three days apart so I would call her. Then when we was done, she would laugh and say "Talk to you in 3 days". Then she would call on the 10th and sing to me, Marilyn Monroe-style...never quite making it to the end without giggling. I am trying not to be too sad...

She's been DJing in my head so it’s been Morris Day, Rick Astley and Simple Minds. And giggling in my head – chair-dancing too. It's kinda nice to know that somewhere she's dancing for real. I miss her and will raise a glass in her honor tonight.


As far as my birthday is concerned, I have decided to be selfish. Gonna go out of town with L for a couple days, then taking next week off and doing things I want to do. Or at least try.

Wish me luck.

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reprobayt: (Default)
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